Islam vs Noah and Russell Crowe!


Hugh Paxton’s Blog notes that Noah (that animal rescuer with a boat, you know the prophet I’m talking about, God alone knows how Noah squeezed them all in, his ark must have spent years circumnavigating the globe, he must have penetrated deep forests, ascended the Andes, crossed oceans to grab a couple of reticent monk seals etc.) will be showing in Thailand in 3D starring Russell Crowe, Jennifer Connelly on the 10th of this month.

Malaysia, Indonesia and a bunch of other freedom-retarded countries have banned it. Religious reasons. Apparently Noah was a prophet and looking at the image of a prophet distracts the faithful from thinking about Allah.

I don’t think a lot about Allah because I am an infidel.

If I burn in hell then that’s the price I must pay for reason! If some Muslims thought more about Allah and less about stealing money from vulnerable tourists, hoarding oil and disobeying all the edicts I’d take Islam a bit more seriously. But everybody knows all about that! Back to the plot!

Come on guys! It’s a stupid story! Noah! Really! Every animal two by two! Every animal in the world?

How about the bugs? Did the chiggers come marching in? The mites? The ants? How do you get two ants together? And where, Noah, do you stow the elephants? And how do you keep those tapirs from getting into it with the tigers?

Oh dear! The rhinos!

Can somebody please please stop the hamsters from reproducing!

Hey, Noah! The llamas are seasick and the leopards escaped and that thing, the giant anteater from Argentina, wants to eat the ants and the crocodiles are seriously pissed off because there’s a lion trying to fight the hyenas that are busy with the bears. And there’s an anaconda.

Hey! Shut up! I’m running this rescue mission! Ah, for Heavens sake can’t you control that porcupine! And the vampire bats!

HUGH PAXTON’S BLOG VERDICT: It’s a fairy story!

Only radical Islamists could take offence. Because they are prone to stupidity and lack joy or interest in life and exult in causing misery to others. And banning movies!

And some Christians could join that club.

Come on guys! It’s a story. Not a truth! It’s a an exciting film (I hope). Nothing malicious or anything.

Jews? I’ve heard no objections from that quarter. The Hindus seem anxious to see this film. I will go and see it. You’ll get a full review!

I will watch it in the full comfort of a deluxe Bangkok cinema. And might fall asleep. The seats in Bangkok cinemas are so accommodating, so “sit back and relax” that I tend to drift off.


Hugh in Bangkok

2 Responses to “Islam vs Noah and Russell Crowe!”

  1. Doug Says:

    Thanks..that was just too funny…

  2. Hugh Paxton Says:

    Doug! Glad you liked it! Wait for the review!


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