Cure for warts

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My beloved daughter has some warts. They are small, white, and I have no idea why they started. I don’t have many ideas how to stop them. I thought about washing her in a silver bowl full of moonlight (a CS Lewis magical remedy in the Voyage of the Dawn Treader) but lack a silver bowl big enough. I don’t actually have a silver bowl. My beloved brother suggested I wipe the offending warts with meat and bury it in the garden. As it goes, so shall the warts. I think he’s been in Louisiana too long. Picking up that bayou voodoo thing! But definitely worth a try! It’ll probably work!

These aren’t big horrible warts. Minute, miniature warts. The sort of wart that is not a noticeable physical deformation. But she doesn’t want them. Any suggestions? I want traditional therapy contributions. The doctor has used lasers, dry ice, everything and the warts still revive. We’ll try the meat. But as soon as I bury it a monitor lizard will dig it up. It might waddle away arrogantly with meat and new warts – I don’t think monitors are too concerned about warts – but it will probably just eat the meat. I just want these warts to go away!

Cheers from Bangkok!

Hugh

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